Forward

pressing my ears into this old song so
many times, and so hard that I am hoping
it will take the tears from my cheeks
and make them into something lovelier

it should not remind me of you, but
I do not need much encouragement
to remember your curves and sway
or the secrets you kept

you took your time with me, you took
so much more than I knew I carried
you made my load lighter, but
you stole my strength also

I saw shimmering tens and twenties
of years into a future we spun
together, and I never once suspected
it was all just dramatic irony

I was the last one to find out.

and of course I miss you, and of course
I run from the songs you sang (and listen
to these others instead) because
the echo of you is too loud already

of course you still stir me up
but I have tasted your spoiled ink enough
now, I have seen what you sell
and I cannot turn back

I have no memory of this future without you
so I am treading uncharted ground
and hoping for the best, and there is no
way of knowing where you have landed

the crash crushed us both, I know
but your legs will mend in time
I hope you learn lessons well
I hope you see beautiful things

I will try to remember the best parts of you.