For The Love Of You

I have been saying your name
in my head
but I am too afraid
to part my lips and
move my tongue and
speak it aloud
because it burns my lips like whiskey
when I am finished

the hard kind
that warms the belly
and scorches the throat
and that’s what you are
to me –
the sword I swallow
to keep it a secret
to hide it
in the dark
because you look more
beautiful than ever
in the daylight
and that scares me

I wish that I could
bury these words
below layers of
flowers and moons, and
other things that would
do you a little
justice, but
I must be brave
and send this pile of letters
out into the world
to see where they fall
into line and spell
your name

and I have been saying
“I love you”
in my head
but I am too secure
in my own insecurities
to bring the tender flesh of
truth into the light
and risk it being
sunburned,
because your rays are sharp
and I love the cuts they give me
and you make me
feel
like I am a crab
outside of its shell

I am a fool
in your shadow
a coward
waiting to be freed,
tossed from my own safe shores
deep into the brine of you
and to breathe in
the salt that you sweat.
I rise and fall with you.
and I hope you know
that all of my poems
are love poems
for you.